Most crossdreamers and gender variant people have periods of their lives when they ask: "Am I really trans?" What they mean is normally: "Am I transsexual? Am I really my target gender?"
Olivia puts it this way over at CDL:
"So tackling this issue of am I trans? Does it matter if I am? If I am should I transition? Will I regret it? What if I do? Will I lose everything? Does that matter? What am I so afraid of? Maybe I am just crazy? Is being trans why I get so depressed, and have panic attacks. Is it why I am so self destructive? Am I just gay? If I am why aren't I attracted to gay guys? Is it because I was abused... because my mother hated me? Maybe I am an addict because my parents and siblings are addicts, and not because I am trans? How can I know? Why don't I know!!?"